Animus

Animus, Full Movie 1h20m, Released 2013

Maya convinces her four film student pals to travel to an old mining town deep in Southern Arizona to document paranormal activity at the creepy, abandoned Copper Queen hospital. Before its decline and closure, the hospital was considered the best facility in the state. Since then, it has only brought shame to the dwindling community. The students begin by interviewing the townspeople, receiving mixed impressions until a local store owner urges them to seek out Mrs. Campbell, a long time townie and former nurse at the Copper Queen. If there’s any information about the hospital, she would have it. At Mrs. Campbell’s home the students are captivated by the shocking truth surrounding the hospital’s decline and embark on a horrific journey that would lead them to the shocking cruelty and neglect the hospital housed behind hidden doors for many years…

…hint: his name isn’t Animus.

Zombie Wars: Battle of the Bone

Zombie Wars: Battle of the Bone, Full Movie 1h29m, Released 2014

If you were hungry for a zombie movie with a little Belfast flavor than you will be a happy camper upon discovering Zombie Wars: Battle to the Bone. It’s an Irish kung-fu zombie shoot-em-up from writer/director George Clarke. The film opens on a typical Belfast scene: two opposing sides facing-off in one of Belfast’s regularly held protest/riots, and as things get violent an army of drug crazed zombies descend on the city forcing the opposing side to put aside their petty differences and join forces to save humanity and stop this new threat from taking over the city.

Also, there’s a tank!

Hayride

Hayride, Full Movie 1h33m, Released 2012

The very best horror movies take something that is slightly scary and turn the fright knob up to eleven. Think of the famous Halloween franchise, as a kid Halloween is slightly scary, but if there were masked, invincible killers stalking your neighborhood, it’d be utterly frightening. Recall the ever-current Friday the 13th franchise: kids away from home for the first time at summer camp, sure that was a little scary when you were 12, add in a masked, invincible killer stalking your summer camp, again utterly frightening.

So here we have Terron R. Parsons’ take on that angle: a fellow is home for fall break from college with his sweetheart and invites her along on a slightly spooky nighttime hayride. This time an escaped, masked killer happens to be on the loose and brings a childhood legend to life: PITCHFORK. The world’s angriest hayride patron, determined to make everyone pay…

…with their lives.

No Tell Motel

No Tell Motel, Full Movie 1h23m, Released 2012

If there is anything creepier than an abandoned motel in the middle of nowhere, the filmmakers responsible for No Tell Motel couldn’t think of it. Their vision of such a place obviously includes a malevolent, supernatural force patiently biding its time at the motel until a group of unsuspecting friends (with very poor navigational abilities) get stranded when their RV breaks down.

Obviously they have no choice but to spend the night in the creepy motel; and when they do, secrets are revealed and the angry, restless spirits take vengeance upon the living.

All American Zombie Drugs

All American Zombie Drugs, Full Movie 1h39m, Released 2013

This week, Kings of Horror brings you the Cheech and Chong of zombie infection drugs: Vinny and Sebastian. Yes, they’re losers who, despite recently graduating from high school, are going nowhere in their small town. Yes, they’re drug addicts with little redeeming social value, but when they find a recipe for street drugs on the internet they suddenly get addicted to something else: entrepreneurship! Well, drug dealing. Until, that is, they learn that their homemade party drug concoction turns its users into zombies and everyone knows the old adage: you can’t sell anything to a zombie, unless you like getting paid in brains.

If you can’t laugh at stoners and zombies, you probably can’t laugh at anything.